Illustra
02-06-2007, 05:20 AM
Why I fired my secretary
Last week was my birthday
and I didn't feel very well
waking up on that morning.
I went downstairs for breakfast
hoping my wife would be pleasant
and say, "Happy Birthday!", and
possibly have a small present for me.
As it turned out,
she barely said good morning,
let alone "Happy Birthday."
I thought...
Well, that's marriage for you,
but the kids....
They will remember.
My kids came bounding down stairs to
breakfast and didn't say a word.
So when I left for the office,
I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent.
As I walked into my office,
my secretary Jane said,
"Good Morning Boss,
and by the way Happy Birthday! "
It felt a little better that at least
someone had remembered.
I worked until one o'clock,
when Jane knocked on my door
and said, "You know,
It's such a beautiful day outside,
and it is your Birthday,
what do you say we go out to lunch,
just you and me."
I said, "Thanks, Jane,
that's the greatest thing
I've heard all day.
Let's go!"
We went to lunch.
But we didn't go
where we normally would go.
She chose instead a quiet bistro
with a private table.
We had two martinis each
and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.
On the way back to the office,
Jane said, "You know,
It's such a beautiful day...
We don't need to go straight back to the office, Do We ?"
I responded,
"I guess not. What do you have in mind?"
"Lets go to my apartment it's just around the corner."
After arriving at her apartment,
Jane turned to me and said,
" Boss, if you don't mind,
I'm going to step into the bedroom
for just a moment. I'll be right back."
"Ok," I nervously replied.
She went into the bedroom and,
after a couple of minutes, she came
out carrying a huge birthday cake
Followed by my wife, my kids,
and dozens of my friends and co-workers,
all singing "Happy Birthday.
And I just sat there...
On the couch..
Naked.
Last week was my birthday
and I didn't feel very well
waking up on that morning.
I went downstairs for breakfast
hoping my wife would be pleasant
and say, "Happy Birthday!", and
possibly have a small present for me.
As it turned out,
she barely said good morning,
let alone "Happy Birthday."
I thought...
Well, that's marriage for you,
but the kids....
They will remember.
My kids came bounding down stairs to
breakfast and didn't say a word.
So when I left for the office,
I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent.
As I walked into my office,
my secretary Jane said,
"Good Morning Boss,
and by the way Happy Birthday! "
It felt a little better that at least
someone had remembered.
I worked until one o'clock,
when Jane knocked on my door
and said, "You know,
It's such a beautiful day outside,
and it is your Birthday,
what do you say we go out to lunch,
just you and me."
I said, "Thanks, Jane,
that's the greatest thing
I've heard all day.
Let's go!"
We went to lunch.
But we didn't go
where we normally would go.
She chose instead a quiet bistro
with a private table.
We had two martinis each
and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.
On the way back to the office,
Jane said, "You know,
It's such a beautiful day...
We don't need to go straight back to the office, Do We ?"
I responded,
"I guess not. What do you have in mind?"
"Lets go to my apartment it's just around the corner."
After arriving at her apartment,
Jane turned to me and said,
" Boss, if you don't mind,
I'm going to step into the bedroom
for just a moment. I'll be right back."
"Ok," I nervously replied.
She went into the bedroom and,
after a couple of minutes, she came
out carrying a huge birthday cake
Followed by my wife, my kids,
and dozens of my friends and co-workers,
all singing "Happy Birthday.
And I just sat there...
On the couch..
Naked.